Now that we got that out of the way, what does it mean to be an extroverted introvert? You may have thought you could only be one or the other, right? Simply not true. You can be an extroverted introvert or an introverted extrovert. If you really think about it, people are very complex individuals, especially emotionally and personality-wise. Not one adjective will perfectly describe us. Every experience we go through shapes us in a way and over 26+ years of experiences will definitely get us closer to figuring out who we are and what makes our hearts happy.
For me, that is alone-time. [Sorry not sorry, friends!]
When I get into this topic with friends and family, they are so quick to tell me I am absolutely not an introvert. “You’re so friendly and outgoing! You are never shy about talking to new people and making people laugh.” This is true, but just because I don’t necessarily have a shyness problem or fear interacting in social environments, does not mean I am THRIVING on it. Surprise, surprise… I am wishing I could be on my couch with a good book instead.
Don’t get me wrong, there are times I definitely need to get out and socialize. I am also quick to get bored and sad when I am engaging in the exact same routine day in and day out. Switching it up is good sometimes. But most times, I am just happier on my own. I even go as far as avoiding or ignoring invites all together, because I feel like people just won’t understand when I tell them: “No, thanks! I just want to do absolutely nothing tonight, and probably every night until I spontaneously feel like I need to socialize again!”
But there’s a beautiful side to being an introvert. We are vert self-aware, thus, we feel no need to explain ourselves or our intentions to others. 🙂
According to Very Well Mind, here are a few common signs that you may be an introvert:
- Being around lots of people drains your energy. Extroverts, on the other hand, gain energy from such interactions.
- You enjoy solitude. As an introvert, your idea of a good time is a quiet afternoon to yourself to enjoy your hobbies and interests. A few hours alone with a good book, a peaceful nature walk or your favorite television program are great ways to help you feel recharged and energized.
- You have a small group of close friends. Just because you may not love party environments where there are lots of unknown and new people, doesn’t mean you don’t love spending quality time with your few and true; friends and family.
- People often describe you as quiet and may find it difficult to get to know you. But if you’re like me, this is not the case. You don’t have to be quiet and shy to be an introvert!
- Too much stimulation leaves you feeling distracted and unfocused. When introverts have to spend time in activities or environments that are very hectic, they can end up feeling unfocused and overwhelmed. Extroverts, on the other hand, tend to thrive in situations where there is a lot of activity and few chances of becoming bored.
- You are very self-aware. Because introverts tend to be inward-turning, they also spend a great deal of time examining their own internal experiences. If you feel like you have a very good knowledge and insight into yourself, your motivations, and your feelings, you might be more of an introvert.
- You like to learn by watching. Where extroverts tend to prefer to jump right in and learn through hands-on experience, introverts typically prefer learning through observation. While extroverts typically learn through trial and error, introverts learn best by watching.
- You are drawn to jobs that involve independence. As you might imagine, jobs that require a great deal of social interaction usually hold little appeal to people high in introversion. On the other hand, careers that involve working independently are often a great choice for introverts. For example, an introvert might enjoy working as a writer, accountant, computer programmer, graphic designer, pharmacist, or artist. (Very Well Mind)
When I say I am a extroverted introvert, I simply mean, while I prefer to be alone [or with close, close friends and family], it doesn’t mean I will never go out or socialize. I am very good at socializing and it may appear I am thriving at the bar [when I go out once a year].. but in reality, I am a bit overwhelmed, wish the music was softer, wish there weren’t so many unknown faces, and wish that I was drinking a latte on my couch instead.
And to sum me up in meme form:
Does this sound like you? Don’t be embarrassed about it! You’re not alone and it is not weird to not want to be out doing things all the time. Just maybe, I’ll stop ignoring invites and straight up be like, “Listen, I have plans to watch TV”… because the people who don’t understand, aren’t your real friendz anyway, sis.